Meeting grief where it’s greatest

Written by JENNIFER LONDON | Photographed by KATE’S CLUB

Kate’s Club is a nonprofit with a clear mission: To empower children and teens, their families, and young adults facing life after the death of a parent, sibling, caregiver or someone important to them.

Founded in metro Atlanta, Kate’s Club serves children ages 5 to 18 and is now in 16 counties throughout Georgia, including Coweta. The nonprofit offers services and programs at their four clubhouse locations with meetings held in-person and virtually. The services are also available in some school systems.

Kate’s Club came to Newnan in 2019 when Ruth Scott, mental health coordinator for Coweta County School System, brought the group in for training with school counselors. Currently, 14 schools around Coweta County have Kate’s Club programs.

“We’re incredibly happy to be in Newnan and in Coweta County,” says Lisa Aman, executive director for Kate's Club. “There's a great need.”

Aman explains the club follows the child bereavement estimation model, which combines information from the Centers for Disease Control and public health data.

Megan Crawford Tyburski, whose father died when she was 19, is the Newnan coordinator of Kate’s Club and eager to talk with people about grief.

“A lot of times those kids don’t have resources,” says Tyburski. “They’re kind of lost in the middle, so Kate’s Club is a way for them to connect.”

Parent Tia Eaddy and her son have been members of Kate’s Club for close to a year. Tia expresses appreciation for the welcoming and safe space that helps them share their thoughts and feelings.

“I appreciate the different activities that Kate’s Club incorporates regularly during Family Nights and Clubhouse days,” says Eaddy. “These activities allow families to think of ways to continue to remember our loved ones, express our feelings, and focus on trying to be in a healthy mental and physical space. My son looks forward to going to each session and has been able to bond with other children from Kate’s Club. I also appreciate how I've been able to connect and build support networks with Kate’s Club families.”

Eaddy encourages anyone with children who grieve the loss of a loved one to get connected with Kate’s Club.

Kate’s Club Newnan Clubhouse meets at SouthCrest Church, at 365 International Park, and parents and caregivers have the option to attend Park Bench, a group just for them.

“We want parents to have support just as we want the kids to have support,” says Tyburski. “It’s the education piece and also the community piece. This is one place parents can let it out and connect with other people who actually get what they’re going through.”

According to Aman, “The No. 1 indicator by far – there’s not even a close second – for a child’s ability to process their grief in a healthy way is the surviving caregiver’s ability to process their grief.”

Kate’s Club works to make talking about grief easier for kids and their parents.

“The thing about grief is that it’s so isolating, which it shouldn’t be,” says Aman. “That’s a cultural issue, right? Kate’s Club tries to change the conversation, kind of from an advocacy and education perspective. That’s why we do so much training in school systems to get teachers and school counselors to get more comfortable with grief and to recognize it in kids.”

It’s important for families and children to know that it’s OK to grieve, to have fun, be angry, to feel guilty, and it’s OK to feel relief, according to Aman.

“There are a lot of big feelings that come with grief, and a lot of what we talk about is that they’re all OK,” says Aman. “They’re all part of you as an individual, and we try to help provide you with tools to work your way through all of those feelings and to understand why they exist and to know – Guess what? – the kid sitting next to me has the same set of feelings.”

Stephanie Ruff, mother of daughters Sydney and Simone, says her family has found comfort and support from gathering with other families going through the difficulty of losing a loved one.

“It helps my girls understand that they are not alone and there are other kids that are just like them,” says Ruff. “For me as a parent, I am able to socialize with other caregivers and have a safe place to express our ups and downs on this journey of grief.”

Miranda Hults says Kate’s Club has helped her and her daughter Avery find a community of people who understand and know exactly how they feel.

“Avery has so many new friends thanks to Kate’s Club,” says Hults. “It’s given us a sense of belonging.”

Abby’s Angels founder Natalie Bacho played a pivotal role in getting Kate’s Club into Newnan, according to Tyburski, who says, “Natalie makes sure we have what we need to be in Newnan.”

While Kate’s Club does not offer therapy, it’s certainly therapeutic, according to Tyburski.

“This is group-based, it’s recreational, it’s therapeutic, and we build community and coping skills,” she says. “We make this fun and enjoyable. Sometimes we’re going to talk about some hard things, but you’re going to have fun doing it.”

It’s not the club anyone wants to be a member of, but it’s a good thing it’s available for those who need it, according to Aman, who says the group’s biggest challenge is raising awareness: “A lot of families don’t know about us, and grief is hard to talk about.”

To learn more, visit katesclub.org.  NCM